Features
Tours de Farce: Dormitory Daze
“Downloading more Metallica songs, Tom. Thought I should grab them before Napster shuts off the mother lode”
“Still? How many do you have? Oh, mind if I get a Pepsi out of the fridge?”
“Help yourself. Just leave a dollar on the counter. How many songs? Oh, I don’t know, 256,212, give or take a dozen.”
“You must really like that band.”
“Like em? I love em! I’m their biggest fan.”
“I have to go to the library this afternoon. I don’t suppose you could give me a ride?”
“Sure, but I’ll need money for gas.”
“Whatever. I’ll bet you’re really excited about seeing Metallica at the stadium.”
“I’m counting down the days. The girl who sits next to me in copyright law class works for the promoter. Says she can get me free tickets.”
“Cool. Hey, can I have a Twinkie?”
“50 cents.”
“Uh, I don’t have 50 cents. I gave you my last dollar for that Pepsi. Can I owe you?”
“Look, Tom. Twinkies don’t grow on trees and gas is expensive. I’m not made of money, you know. Oh, wait a minute.”
“What’s up?”
“Somebody just put up more Metallica songs.”
“Metallica! That’s all you ever talk about. Don’t you like any other bands?”
“Other bands? Are you kidding? Metallica rules. Metallica rocks. Next to Metallica, there are no other bands.”
“Don’t you think you’re ripping off the band?” You’ve downloaded thousands of songs and it hasn’t cost you a single dime.”
“Yes it has.”
“When?”
“I bought a new hard drive just last week. Storage ain’t cheap. I’m not…”
“Made of money. Yeah, right. Forget I said anything. Are you going to download their songs all day?”
“Sure, after all. . .”
“I know. You’re their biggest fan.”