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Tours de Farce: Letting The Cat Out Of The Bag
“David? David?? I’m not sure I know any David.”
“David Boies, your lawyer down here in Florida.”
“Oh, that David. Am I president, yet?”
“Not yet, Al. But Florida’s Supreme Court has issued a stay until they hear our case on Monday. So we’re looking pretty good.”
“You mean I have to wait until Monday to be president? That’s two whole days. I don’t know if I can wait that long.”
“Then why don’t you and Tipper take in a show? Suzanne Vega is playing at the Bottom Line in New York tonight.”
“How about Tuesday? Will I be president on Tuesday?”
“Probably not. Here’s a good one. Catie Curtis and Dar Williams are playing in Boston on Sunday night. Do they let you take Air Force Two to concerts, Al?”
“Most of the time. Unless Bill needs a place to hide out from Hillary. How about Wednesday? Can I be president on Wednesday?”
“Al, would you just relax and forget about the election for a while? There’s a lot of good shows this weekend, like Fastball in Detroit, or Keb’ Mo’ at the
“I don’t know. I’ve been waiting for over a week to be president. That’s a long time.”
“Al, we’re doing everything we can. In the meantime, just relax. By the way, have you looked at that CD I sent you?”
“I was just installing it on my computer when you called, David. What is this thing?”
“It’s my other client, Al. It’s called Napster.”
“Really? What does it do? Oh, look. It has a cute little cat on the home page.”
“Napster is being sued by the record labels. It’s been a tough fight but we’re making some headway. Look, Al, I called you to talk about…”
“Oh, wow! Look at all the songs!”
“We should really discuss our strategy if the state supreme court rules against us.”
“There’s George Jones, Kylie Minogue and Megadeth. This is great!”
“About our strategy, Al.”
“Can’t talk. Downloading.”
“Al! Will you please listen to me? We’re talking about the presidency. Surely, you must have a few questions.”
“Well, I do have one question, David.”
“Yes?”
“How long does it take to download the full-length version of ‘Nights In White Satin’ on a dial-up connection?”