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Tours de Farce: Growing Up Is Hard To Do
“Coming right up. Is that a new jacket?”
“Yeah. Birthday present from my parents. I hit the big 3 – 0 yesterday.”
“Then have one on me. You know, when I was growing up, I always envied the kids whose birthdays were so close to Christmas. What was it like?”
“It was great. You’re just getting over that birthday buzz when it’s time for Christmas. For me, it always seemed as if my birthday lasted a whole month.”
“You have some good memories?”
“Oh, for sure. I can still recall being too excited to sleep on Christmas Eve because I was thinking of all the shows.”
“Shows?”
“Yeah, like Wishbone Ash, Bo Diddley and Micky Dolenz. Or in 1980 when I got 38 Special for Christmas.”
“Are you talking about concerts? For Christmas?”
“Of course. Shucks, I can still recall waking up on Christmas morning and rushing downstairs to see Melanie C under the tree. I thought Santa was the greatest promoter in the world.”
“Promoter?”
“Of course, I never stopped to figure it all out. How a fat promoter in a beard and red suit could deliver Green Day, P.J. Harvey and The Offspring to all the kids in the world at the same time. Or that he did this by traveling around the world on a magical flying sled pulled by eight tiny interns.”
“You thought Santa Claus was a promoter?”
“Who else could bring all those concerts like Bill Wyman and Audio Adrenaline? Yeah, I really got into Christmas. That is, until my parents told me the truth.”
“I know what you mean. I was shattered when my folks told me. That’s got to be one of the toughest things about growing up.”
“It was for me, too. And if that wasn’t hard enough, they had to go and do it on my birthday.”
“Gee, I’m sorry. That had to hurt.”
“You know it. As if turning 30 wasn’t a hassle in itself. I guess this jacket was their way of making up for it.”
“It is a nice one.”
“I know, it’s just that… that….
“What?”
“I just wish they hadn’t hit me with the lowdown on the Easter Agent at the same time.