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Tours de Farce: Daddy’s Little Girl
“Hello, Jenna. I was expecting your call.”
“Daddy? I’ve run into a bit of a problem…”
“I’ve already heard. Vice President Cheney was just in my office. He told me everything.”
“Daddy, let me explain.”
“I must say, I’m awfully disappointed in you, Jenna. This isn’t the first time this has happened.”
“But, Daddy, everyone else was doing it.”
“You promised me that the O-Town incident would be the last time.”
“I know, Daddy, but…”
“Then there was Janet Jackson, Eric Clapton, and RZA. You just wouldn’t listen to me.”
“I’m sorry, Daddy, but…”
“You can’t keep doing this, Jenna. I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a thousand times, just because you’re the President’s daughter, it doesn’t entitle you to any special treatment.”
“Aw, Daddy!”
“We all have to live by the rules, young lady. You don’t see me pulling that stuff at Roxy Music or Madonna.”
“Yes, Daddy. I mean, ‘no, Daddy.'”
“Though I have to admit, I am tempted at times. Like last week at Popa Chubby. However, it wouldn’t be right. Just because I’m the President, it doesn’t mean I can sidestep the rules. The rules are for everyone, including my daughters. It’s what separates us from the Democrats.”
“Yes, but…”
“I know it’s difficult being in the limelight all the time, but if you make a mistake, the press is going to be on you like ticks on a dog. Thank God they didn’t hear about what you pulled at Green Day, U2 and Stevie Nicks.”
“I know, Daddy, but…”
“No ‘buts,’ Jenna. I guess you’re going to have to learn your lesson the hard way. I just can’t interfere in this. It wouldn’t be right.”
“Daddy!”
“I’m sorry, honey, you’re on your own on this one. Consider it a learning experience.”
“You mean…”
“That’s right, Jenna, from now on you’re going to have to pay the ticket service charges just like everyone else.”