It’s a question a child may ask, but not a childish question. The dreaded disease known as Venue Deficiency can strike anywhere at anytime, causing tour dates to be booked as TBAs, or in layman’s terms, “To Be Announced,” leaving fans, roadies and groupies confused and disoriented.

Unfortunately, those who schedule tours like Aerosmith and Neil Diamond are often unaware they are suffering from Venue Deficiency. Nor do they have any idea as to the heartache and chaos that results when they turn in a routing absent of venues. They don’t what they are doing, and are completely oblivious to the fact that children may go to bed at night hungry and cold, not knowing where their favorite artists are playing.

What are the warning signs of Venue Deficiency? For concert industry pros known for booking major artists like Sting, Britney Spears or Vanilla Ice, the most common symptom is forgetting the latest corporate name for the venue in Philadelphia once known as The Spectrum. Other signs include sudden blindness, increased hair growth on one’s palms and severe acne.

What can you do?

For starters, please keep in mind that during the time it takes you to read these words, over 4,810 future booking agents, promoters and tour managers will be born with Venue Deficiency, and only by giving generously when the VD representative knocks on your door can we stop this dreaded malady.

It’s a tough fight, but with perseverance, courage, and plenty of your money, we just might make Venue Deficiency a thing of the past. And someday a child may never have to say to his father: “Daddy? Where’s Richard Cheese & Lounge Against The Machine playing in New York on December 4th & 5th?”

This message has been brought to you by the American Venue Deficiency Association. Give some money today.