“Are these great seats or what?”

“You said it. I’ve been waiting months for this concert.”

“Do you see a lot of shows?”

“Uh uh. I just bought tickets for Ratdog, and next month I’m seeing Neil Diamond and Toilet Boys. How about yourself?”

“Ditto. I just love live music. In fact, I just maxed out my VISA on Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young, *NSYNC and Janet Jackson. I guess you could say I’m a concert addict and the local ticket outlet is my dealer.”

“That’s a good one. Say, do you mind if I ask you a question?”

“Shoot.”

“This show has been sold out for months, right?”

“Yeah.”

“So why is there an empty seat next to you?”

“That seat was for my husband. But he passed away unexpectedly.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say. You said it was ‘unexpected.'”

“Yes. It happened in a freak laser printer mishap. A toner cartridge exploded and blinded him in both eyes.”

“That’s terrible.”

“That’s only half of it. He stumbled around the office until he fell out of the window. Fifteen stories.”

“Oh my…”

“He managed to get back on his feet and dust himself off, but he didn’t see the GWAR tour bus bearing down on him. Left him as flat as a piece of paper.”

“Oh, I am so sorry.”

“It’s okay. I’m learning to cope.”

“But that still doesn’t explain the empty seat. Surely, you could have asked a friend to come with you.”

“Yes I could, but…”

“But what?”

“They’re all at the funeral.”