We can’t blame you. Tour date Websites such as ours can be a bit trying on the old patience. That’s why we had our top computer technologists create an easy, step-by-step guide to looking up all the concert info on our little piece of the Web.

Presenting Pollstar.com For Dummies, Version 2.0

Chapter One: First, you’ll need a computer.

Yes, we’ve listened to your complaints and we’ve paid attention to your rants. You want an easier Website. One that doesn’t tax the brain with mental logic pain. A Website that makes it as easy as possible to look up the dates for Oasis, Unlimited Sunshine 2002 and Smokin’ Grooves.

Chapter Two: Next, plug it in.

“Keep it simple,” you said. “Forget the bells and whistles, just give me Eagles and Linda Ronstadt,” you remarked. With Pollstar.com For Dummies 2.0, we’ve made the world’s easiest tour data site even easier.

Chapter 3: The next thing you need to do is turn on the computer.

With this simple, step-by-step, 561 page guide, you’ll soon be on the pathway to tour date heaven. We’ll teach you how to alphabetize the Superjoint Ritual listing by venue, how to cross-reference the Social Distortion cities with the dates for Bob Dylan, and how to look up big festival productions like Ozzfest 2002 and Brooks & Dunn’s The Neon Circus & Wild West Show.

Chapter Four: If you haven’t yet turned on your monitor, refer to step three.

Easier than Ticketmaster for Imbeciles and containing more pictures than MTV For Fryminds, Pollstar.com For Dummies 2.0 is your roadmap to the routings for John Mayer, Lucinda Williams and Femi Kuti.

Chapter Five: Remember. First you point, then you click.

Pollstar.com For Dummies 2.0. The same book endorsed by Matt Drudge, Dr. Laura and Rush Limbaugh.

Chapter Six: If you’re having trouble clicking, refer to chapter 92; “Knowing Your Left From Your Right.”

Only $9.99 plus shipping and tax. Professional discounts available for all MusicToday.com, VH1.com and Rolling Stone.com employees.

Chapter Seven: The difference between Dearborn and Detroit is that The Rolling Stones are playing in one city, but not the other.

Pollstar.com For Dummies 2.0. A steal at $9.99 per copy. Order yours today!