Features
Tours de Farce: Not Your Average Joe
Airing Monday nights, Joe Promoter features a bevy of lovely ladies being wooed and courted by one Joe R, an international promoter responsible for booking shows by Pearl Jam and R.E.M. However, the difference between this show and other reality shows, is that Joe R. is only pretending to be a promoter. In reality, Joe R. splits his time between working as a laborer for seasonal construction jobs, and as a prophylactic research test subject.
“We interviewed well over 25,000 young men,” says Joe Promoter producer / creator, Larsen E. Whipsade. “Not only did we have to find someone who knew how to negotiate deals for shows by Rainer Maria and Sigur Ros, but we also had to find someone who fit the physical description of a promoter, including broad shoulders, bulging biceps and six-pack abs. I think audiences will agree that Joe R. fits the bill perfectly.”
So far, Whipsnade is right on target. The premier episode of Joe Promoter – which opened with the ladies getting to know the faux promoter at his 20,000 seat amphitheatre located in the south of France – gathered a 65 percent share of the television viewing audience, making it the most watch debut of any of the reality programs, including Tourvivor 2002 – The Axl Rose Challenge, and Meet My Manager, this year’s other new show where potential suitors for lovely female performers such as Tori Amos or Avril Lavigne must first win the approval of the artists’ managers.
“America loves a promoter, and these ladies clearly love Joe Promoter,” says Whipsnade as he glances at the overnight ratings from last night’s episode where Joe R. narrowed the field by giving only five ladies laminated backstage passes for SnoCore Rock and Jefferson Starship. “Of course, none of the ladies have the slightest inkling that Joe R. is only posing as a promoter. After all, when you consider his natural good looks combined with that washboard stomach, sexual stamina and bulging wallet, how could he be anything but a promoter?”
But all good things must come to an end, and come the final episode Joe R. will be revealed to the ladies for what he is – not a promoter but an average “Joe” making $19,000 a year. Of course, the big question on everyone’s mind is what will the ladies do when they learn that Joe has nothing to do with planning major concert events such as Audioslave or Cher?
“I’m sworn to secrecy,” says Whipsnade, who is only one of six people at Pox who has seen the final episode of Joe Promoter. “However, the last five minutes of the program, where Joe R. tells the ladies that he isn’t a concert promoter, has given me an idea for a brand new reality show that I’m thinking of calling When Ticked-Off Ladies Attack. Only on Pox, of course.”