And we’d like to thank you for spending some time with us on this fine, fine Fourth of July, checking out the tour dates on our proud, yet humble Web site. It’s people like you that make it all worthwhile, no matter if you’re just looking for a few extra dates for Reverend Horton Heat or eyeballing the new tour for The Headhunters. Yes, you make the Fourth Of July special.

Unfortunately, there are some people who can’t make it today. Those misfortunate ones who aren’t allowed any time to pull up a chair in front of their computer and look up the listings for Rock City Morgue or Bob Dylan. Hard to believe, isn’t it? That there are some people in the world that just aren’t as fortunate as you.

Keeping that in mind, we’d like to propose a toast. A salute, if you will, to all those poor, misbegotten souls who are unable to join us here today. Ready? Let’s raise our glasses together.

Here’s to the lonely campers, those folks in their tents and sleeping bags who were forced to spend this day in the mountains, for they will not know the joy that is Evan Dando’s Australian tour until Monday. Here’s to the surfers, the sun worshippers and the swimmers who must spend their July 4th holiday at the beach, resulting in them being totally clueless about the latest changes in the routing for the String Cheese Incident. And here’s to the golfers, the picnickers, the hikers and the climbers, for they won’t be able to access the new Anthrax dates until three long and lonely days have passed.

Not everyone can spend the Fourth of July in front of a computer looking up tour schedules for Pearl Jam, Boston and The Rolling Stones. Some people have commitments, others just committed. However, you’re here, and for that we are thankful.

Now, if you’ll excuse us, we’re being forced to go to a pool party, where we’ll be required to consume massive amounts of barbecued animal flesh and wash it down with endless glasses of brewed spirits. We really wish we could stay, but, well, you know how it is. Anyway, before we leave, we’d like to ask of you one small favor.

Do you think you could turn the lights off when you’re done? Thanks.