Thank you for calling the Pollstar.com user support line. Your call is important to us. The average wait for assistance is currently thirty seconds.

That’s right! Ned’s our new customer support manager, specially trained to help you understand tour itineraries…

Thank you for calling the Pollstar.com user support line. Your call is important to us. The average wait for assistance is currently one minute, thirty seconds.

Having trouble grasping the chronological planning behind the Jann Arden schedule? Need help trying to figure out the difference between all the venues named after Verizon Communications? Do you need assistance in keeping track of the additional shows in major markets for Simon & Garfunkel? Ned’s your man in customer support…

Thank you for calling the Pollstar.com user support line. Your call is important to us. The average wait for assistance is currently three minutes, forty-five seconds.

But Ned knows much more than just the routing for Luis Miguel or the dates for Staind and Live. Realizing that concert info attracts people from all walks of life, Ned has worked hard preparing for this position, and has taken classes in first-aid, small engine repair and suicide prevention. No matter how big the problem or how serious the situation, Ned can help…

Thank you for calling the Pollstar.com user support line. Your call is important to us. The average wait for assistance is one hour, fifty seconds.

In fact, Ned has studied all known methods of telephone assistance, including Windows XP support, income tax advice and detailed instructions regarding Celine Dion’s Vegas schedule. Got a problem? Let Ned help…

Thank you for calling the Pollstar.com user support line. Your call is important to us. The average wait for assistance is currently three hours, forty-seven minutes.

Yes, whether you’ve accidentally swallowed rat poison, or if you want to know where Crystal Gayle is playing in Nebraska, Ned can supply the answers to all of your concert routing questions…

Thank you for calling the Pollstar.com user support line. Your call is important to us. The average wait for assistance is currently five hours, thirty-three minutes, twenty-five seconds.

We’re very proud of Ned and our customer support line…

Thank you for calling the Pollstar.com user support line. Your call is important to us. The average wait for assistance is currently one day, seven hours, eighteen minutes, forty-one seconds.

In fact, we’re so proud of Ned that, if this entire customer service thing takes off, we’re going to make him a full-time employee.

Thank you for calling the Pollstar.com user support line. Your call is important to us. The average wait for assistance is currently one week, five days, fourteen hours, sixteen minutes, twenty-one seconds.

That is, if Ned’s mom lets him drop out of high school.