We’re lowering our prices! We’re slashing our rates! We’re cutting our costs! We’re workin’ our tails off to bring you the lowest prices on tour dates anywhere! We’re talking about a 50 percent reduction on The Shins! A 75 percent reduction on Opeth and Melissa Etheridge! A 125 percent reduction on Heart!

But wait, there’s more!

Check out our special discount packages! That’s right! Two itineraries for the price of one! Bob Weir & Ratdog! Sharon, Bram & Friends! Theodore & Bundy!!!!

We’re talking high quality tour dates at rock bottom prices! Search for Tinsley Ellis and Black Rebel Motorcycle Club now and don’t make a payment until 2010. At Pollstar.com your job is your credit! Easy terms! Easy financing! Click now, pay later! We’ll eat a bug if you can beat our best deal!!!

So come on down and walk away with a fine itinerary for John Mayer or Hank III today! We’re talking no down payment, zero interest and years and years to pay! When it comes to tour dates, we are the cheapest place on the Net! Heck, we’d give these dates away for free if we could!

But we can’t. After all, exclamation points don’t grow on trees, you know.