Yeah, we know what we said last week. We said that Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr were going to perform together on the Grammys. Obviously that did not happen, and it looks as if our intelligence on the matter was way off. But it could have happened. The Grammy planners had the capability to arrange such an appearance. Telephones, fax machines, cell phones, email – they had the tools, they had the means. So we really weren’t wrong when we said that Macca and Ringo were going to appear. Just an intelligence snafu. That’s all.

While we’re at it, we also would like to say that we weren’t totally off base when we claimed that Roger Waters was going to reunite with Pink Floyd. Sure, it didn’t happen. But that doesn’t mean it couldn’t have happened. All it would have taken is one phone call from Roger to David Gilmour. That’s it. It’s not like those boys don’t know how to contact each other. However, the reunion did not take place. Blame it on faulty intelligence.

And we were completely bamboozled into predicting that there would be a shoving match between Bonnie Raitt and Shania Twain, resulting in an all-out riot with Incubus smashing tables, Lynyrd Skynyrd and the Pixies pinning the Grammy judges to the ground, and Sting forcing the officials at gunpoint to award Grammys to John Mayer, The Strokes and David Byrne. But that doesn’t mean they weren’t thinking about doing such a thing. In fact, we had solid intelligence predicting those bands and artists were perfectly capable of planning such a disturbance. In short, our decision was based on the best of the available intelligence reports. It’s not like we were wrong.

But that’s the way it goes in the music business. You rely on the best intell that your assets can provide. However, satellites, listening devices and hidden Web cams only tell part of the story. You still have to connect the dots. But don’t blame us. We had the best intelligence money can buy. We acted in good faith when we made our nonbiased Grammy predictions last week. It’s not like we were reporting what you wanted to hear. It’s not like we were making it all up. Oh, no.

After all, it’s not like we’re the CIA.