Larry’s a concert-info junkie. He starts each day by logging onto this Web site and perusing the list of shows coming to his town. He knows when his local promoter is announcing a Counting Crows date for his neighborhood amphitheatre, he knows when tickets are going on sale for Van Halen at his favorite sports arena, he even knows all the various artists and bands appearing on every single date for the Vans Warped Tour. Yes, Larry knows his stuff.

But some people think Larry has a problem. You see, something happened to Larry a while back, something that shook his current grasp upon reality. Perhaps it was Axl Rose blaming Buckethead for Guns N’ Roses having to cancel their appearance at Rock In Rio – Lisbon, or maybe it was the shock of seeing Janet’s right nipple during the Super Bowl half time show. No matter what the cause, the effect was the same. Somewhere in that mystical area of the brain that controls free will, Larry’s inner self made the decision to withdraw from the insanity and chaos of the modern day world, and immerse himself in what he loves best – bands, artists and cities, arranged in a chronological order and sorted by date.

Yes, Larry suffers from a rather myopic view of the world. Larry may not know the latest news from Iraq, but he knows where The Allman Brothers Band is playing on July 3. Larry doesn’t have an opinion on President Bush’s tax cuts, but he can figure out the service charges for Eagles tickets without even using a calculator. Needless to say, if you mention “Iran” in Larry’s presence, he’ll respond by ticking off the next three dates for A Flock Of Seagulls.

Yes, some people think Larry has a problem. They say it’s not natural for a grown man to lock himself in his home and spend each waking moment looking at the tour schedules for Bob Dylan and Britney Spears, that it’s not right to know all the venues for The Dead or all the cities hosting Linda Ronstadt and David Byrne. They say that Larry needs to connect with the outside world, that he needs to tear himself away from his computer and get back in touch with current events. They say that life is too important to spend every minute of every waking hour reading schedule after schedule for Nelly Furtado, Rod Stewart and Prince. Yes, some people say that Larry has definitely lost touch with reality.

And what to the other people say? If some people are already claiming that Larry has withdrawn from the real world and that he knows nothing but who’s playing where on which date, what do the rest of the people think of Larry and his tour date obsession?

They just sadly shake their heads and mutter something about some guys having all the luck.