“It’s a yes-man position, isn’t it?”

“In a nutshell, yes. We at Yes Men R Us have been placing the most positive, most affirmative, most spineless men and women in subservient roles in the music industry since 1926. You look at any of the big acts – Phish, Sting, David Bowie – and you’ll find one of our Yes Men behind them.”

“Even Yes?”

“Especially Yes. After all, where do you think they got the name?”

“I never thought of that.”

“Nobody ever does. You see, at Yes Men R Us we take enormous pride in our stealth submissiveness. We’re never obvious, and we never keep a high profile. But whenever someone like Alicia Keys or John Mayer says `Jump,’ – “

“I ask, `how high?'”

“Hmmm… Very good. I’ll bet you’ve had some experience at this sort of thing.”

“At times, sir. At times.”

“Right. Well, let me get to the basics. As one of our Yes Men, you’ll be expected to provide a positive, uplifting environment for one of our clients. If someone like, say, Courtney Love, asks if she looks beautiful, you say `Yes!’ If you’re backstage after a concert by Metallica, and Lars Ulrich comes up to you and asks if it was a good show, you answer `Yes!’ If Britney Spears asks you if she is hotter than Christina and J-Lo combined, you say -“

“Yes!”

“By George, I think you’ve got it. Telling the client what he or she wants to hear, that’s what Yes Men R Us is all about. When can you start?”

“Well. I’ve already given notice to my current employer. Would mid July be okay?”

“July sounds fine. We’ll start you with The Cure’s Curiosa tour. Then we’ll slot you for Avril Lavigne’s fall swing through Europe. You’ll get a base salary of $1000 per week, plus a $25 per day per diem and all the kneepads you need. Oh, by the way, how are your ankles?”

“Tip top shape, sir.”

“Then that settles it. Welcome aboard! Welcome to Yes Men R Us!”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Oh, just one more thing. About your last job.”

“Yes?”

“Just how long were you with the CIA, Mr. Tenet?”