Furthermore, the corporation is not responsible for any alleged opinion a user might derive from this page while viewing tour schedules such as the new routing for the Motley Crue or the updated itineraries for Steve Earle and John Anderson. Any opinions that a reader might perceive, conceptualize or sense are merely figments of the reader’s imagination and do not reflect the corporation.

Moreover, any action that a viewing party may take, no matter if it’s buying tickets for Cher, or passing on tickets for R.E.M. in order to purchase tickets for Yanni, is the responsibility of the viewing party, and should not be considered a reflection of the corporation already mentioned in the preceding paragraphs, as well as subparagraphs 2a, 3d and sub-subparagraphs A through E as mentioned in the licensing agreement.

Likewise, the corporation absolves itself of any blame, liability or accountability for any actions anyone might take based upon the content of this site. This includes, but is not limited to, larceny, grand larceny, theft, embezzlement, extortion or violation of federal RICO statutes in order to obtain tickets for listed events contained within this site such as Rod Stewart, Bright Eyes and Judas Priest.

Finally, by clicking through this disclaimer, the viewer absolves said corporation of any injury, body harm, arrest and/or incarceration that might result from performing any lewd or insidious acts that the viewer has been instructed to commit via the craftily placed subliminal messages found between the dates for Lou Reed, Elton John and sometimes David Cassidy, as well as the concealed messages found within the preceding paragraphs, even though current statistical analysis suggests that users rarely read past the first paragraph of any disclaimer such as this one.

In summary, the corporation, including, but not limited to relatives, spouses, offspring, mistresses, pets, or anyone else employed by said corporation, shall not be held responsible for anything found on this page, nor on any of the other pages within this corporation’s Website, such as the ones displaying dates for Norah Jones and Diana Krall.

In short, we’re not responsible for anything. Click here to continue.