Features
Tours de Farce: What’s Up Doc?
Well, not drastically late. Maybe just a few minutes past deadline. As if we really pay attention to those due dates, anyway. But it’s not like deadlines at Pollstar.com are carved in stone or chiseled out of granite. After all, you gotta be pretty flexible when it comes to dealing with a touring schedule for a Bruce Springsteen or a Brooks & Dunn.
But we were almost late. That’s because we had an appointment with our doctor. Well, to be honest, he isn’t your average, run-of-the-mill, ears-nose-throat, turn-and-cough doctor. But we’ve been seeing him of late, mainly because we’ve been worried about our health. You see, you need your health when tasked with updating a routing for Green Day or plugging in dates for Judas Priest. But that doesn’t mean that such activities are physically tiring or possibly damaging to one’s bodily fitness. It’s not like it requires any heavy lifting or undue strain on the old back. You see, it’s more of a mental thing, and as anyone who has spent some time visiting Pollstar.com, we’re much more mental than those other concert-info Web site operators.
But that doesn’t mean that we’re losing our grasp on reality or that our loaf of bread has ceased to stop on all floors. At least, not for most of us. However, there is that sales guy who likes to lock himself in the server closet with the itinerary for Cher and a jar of fresh mayonnaise. But he’s in sales, and he doesn’t count. Well, he does count, for he’s responsible for the cash flow that results in us being able to post the calendars for Deep Purple and that Bryan Adams / Def Leppard co-headline. But this isn’t about him. Well, it was about him in this paragraph, but it’s not about him anymore.
Instead, it’s about us. Well, mostly us. But between you, us and the wall, there’s a few loose screws banging around in one of the other departments. However, ethics, or what little principles we still stand for, prevent us from mentioning who in this building has, perhaps, slipped a gear or two or maybe blown a cerebral gasket, ring or valve. Like the guy on our loading dock who has a messianic complex and thinks he’s Mel Gibson.
But we digress.
What we’re trying to say is that we were almost late because we were meeting with our doctor, our psychiatrist, our shrink. Furthermore, while he says that we’re still a little too obsessive about concert info, like the schedules for Eddie Money, George Benson and Queen + Paul Rodgers, he also says that we are making headway on other fronts. Well, maybe not headway, but we are showing signs of progress. Well, maybe not progress, but according to our analyst, we are showing some advancement and growth in regards to one of our other problems. Of course, not all of our problems, but according to him, we’re doing much better than before on one specific problem.
You see, our psychiatrist says we’re finally making some headway towards focusing on the message at hand, and that we’re not rambling even nearly as much as used to. Now, isn’t that good news? Well, maybe not good, but…