Oh, You Ate One Tour?

For all the chatter of a Van Halen tour that included "Diamond" Dave, was anybody shocked when the train never left the station?

The VH boys have always been a volatile bunch. But the rumors began in earnest as early as November that Eddie Van Halen and former cohort David Lee Roth would be the nexus of a VH tour with Eddie’s untested 15-year-old son taking his first tender steps to rock stardom as bassist. Michael Anthony, who held the bottom for decades and gave VH its signature harmonies, has been persona non grata since aligning himself with Sammy Hagar.

At the time, the band spokesman declined to comment on the reports.

Next up, Eddie Van Halen told Guitar World in December, "I’m telling Dave, ‘Dude, get your ass up here and sing, bitch! … Whether he wants to rise to the occasion is entirely up to him, but we’re ready to go."

Again, the rest of the band – meaning Alex Van Halen and/or the businessmen of VH, apparently – kept mum. Eddie had his own spokeswoman – his girlfriend, Janie Lisewski, who helped fuel the story.

Then came an article in Billboard that said Roth was going to ink the deal soon; a statement from Eddie’s camp soon followed, and the race was on. Within 24 hours, the world was awash with tales of a VH tour.

The only problem was that, apparently, the announcement was too soon for some of the folks who work behind the scenes and caught others completely off guard. For that matter, when Pollstar got confirmation that the dream tour went down the pipe, some in the industry were still unconvinced.

The tour was very close to happening, and that’s all we can say. The length of the postponement is known only to the fortune telling machine on Santa Monica Pier.