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Tours de Farce: Concert Academia
“Still working on mapping the support act genome.”
“I heard you had a little trouble.”
“You must mean the attempt to fuse KISS with Ted Nugent at the Houston facility. Didn’t quite work out.”
“That’s a shame. Anyone hurt?”
“No. Luckily they all got out of the lab before she blew.”
“Glad to hear it. Are you teaching any classes this fall?”
“Just a freshman class. Booking 101.”
“Cell phones, contracts and screaming?”
“That’s right, just the basics.”
“I say, this is some party. I haven’t seen most of these people in ages.”
“I know. Have you seen Dr. Atkission?”
“No. I take it she’s back from the dig?”
“Just for a short time. She’s still tracing the fossil records, trying to prove a direct link between Cradle Of Filth and ‘N Sync.”
“She always did like to take chances. Say, isn’t that Dr. T.N. Adveni, from Samuel Franklin Xavier University, standing over there by himself? I think I’ll go over and say hello.”
“You don’t want to do that.”
“Why not?”
“I guess you haven’t heard. He lost his audience grant on the Supremes project. Had to scrap the entire experiment.”
“Oh, that’s too bad. And he worked a long time on that one. What do you think happened?”
“I don’t know, but the rumor mill says he relied on too much second generation genetic material.”
“Really? You would think someone like him would have known better. This must be devastating for him.”
“I wouldn’t worry too much about him. He still has his paper on the effect of Neil Young power chords on Pearl Jam DNA coming out next month. Besides, good old SFX University will stand behind him.”
“Yes, I guess tenure is everything, eh?”