“It’s been a wonderful life, hasn’t it Nappy?”

“It’s you that makes it all worth while, Hilary. You and your little dog, Lars.”


“Ahh, my sweet, sweet Hilary. You’ve stuck by me through thick and thin, but there’s just one thing I never understood.”

“What’s that, dearest?”

“When I think of all the guys you sued for facilitating the copying of songs by acts like Bob Dylan and Bon Jovi, why did you pick me?”

“I don’t know, Nappy. Maybe it was the first time I saw your legal briefs. They were so tightly packed with the details of copying songs by Dixie Chicks, Dream Theater and Jethro Tull, that I couldn’t help but take notice. At first I was repulsed, but then I was insanely attracted. It all seemed so sinful and wicked. I just couldn’t resist. Especially when I saw all those Metallica songs.”

“Remember our first date, my little turtle dove?”

“How can I forget? I still remember how excited I was when you showed me how big your T3 was by downloading that Kid Rock song.”

“Really? I never thought size mattered with you.”

“Oh, but it does, Nappy. The bigger the pipe, the better the connection.”

“And now it’s our 50th anniversary. You’ve made me a very happy man, Hilary, but I’m still amazed that you’ve stayed with me through all these years.”

“Really, Nappy? I thought my reason was rather obvious.”

“You mean it was my T3 all along?”

“It’s nice, but it wasn’t the main reason.”

“Then it was the briefs?”

“They were cute, especially the ones about downloading Red Hot Chili Peppers and Tina Turner, but that wasn’t the reason either.”

“Then what was it, my saucy little vixen?”

“Why, Nappy, I always thought you knew. It was your incredible staying power.”