Does your temperature rise at the sight of tight pants and low slung guitars? Do you swoon at the mere mention of Hatebreed or Howie Day? Do you want to meet the musician of your dreams?

Then this is the book for you. Introducing How To Pick Up Musicians.

For years only “bad girls” could meet musicians. You’ve seen them passing notes to roadies, waiting outside the stage door for Lyle Lovett or Ratt, wearing leather outfits that were painted on their bodies, their lips forming that perfect, ruby red “bee-sting” pout. And you probably said to yourself, “Gosh, I’d like to meet a musician, but I’m way too shy to dress and act like that.”

After you read How To Pick Up Musicians, there will be no more lonely nights spent at home, cuddled up with your cat, long after that final encore has echoed through the sports arena. After reading only the first chapter, you’ll have acts like Iron Maiden and Dream Theater eating out of your hands. You’ll be sitting front row for AC/DC, hanging backstage with Sum 41 and waxing the snake for Alice Cooper.

With “How To Pick Up Musicians,” you’ll learn great introductory lines like, “I have my own washing machine,” “Go ahead, use my credit card,” and the 100% guaranteed, “My parents are gone and they left me the keys to the liquor cabinet.”

Plus, for the first 100 orders, we’ll include, free of charge, our best seller, “How To Dump A Freeloading Drummer,” with a special introduction written by Lars Ulrich.

The glamour! The excitement! The laundry! All of this is just a phone call away. Order “How To Pick Up Musicians” today, and in a couple of weeks you too will be saying, “I’m with the band!”