The Web site contains thousands of pictures depicting people booking concert dates.

They come in all sizes and positions. There’s the Midwestern independent promoter, his calendar wide open, his dates spread before the camera, his mouth open in a seductive “do what you will with me” look as the booking agent drives home the final guarantee for Type O Negative.

Then there’s the black & white spy camera keyhole shots of the west coast club owner as he’s negotiating for Dixie Dregs and Dave Davies Kink Kronikles with a middle agent from Bakersfield. Her contract riders press the promoter up against his desk, her spurs mercilessly dig into his avails.

But perhaps the most shocking of all the photographs is the depiction of the concert promoters at settlement time. The artist is hidden in the shadows, but reliable sources claim it could be either Pantera, Creed or Elton John. The promoters encircle the local venue owner, whose face looks like that of a deer caught in the headlights, as the cameraman moves in for the money shot.

These are the concert industry photos that made Playboy editors blush and Penthouse scribes vomit. Hustler passed on them outright, saying some things were never meant to be photographed. Needless to say, access to the Web site is banned in France.

What to do? How can we protect our children, our loved ones, our families from the prurient concert interests of deviants who want to show pictures of people booking dates for Limp Bizkit and Sting? These are questions being asked by liberals and conservatives alike as they grapple with issues such as “free speech” and how it applies to unnatural support acts and ticket service charges. When is enough, enough?

Meanwhile, our moral leaders look for a decision, a reprieve from this newest form of obscenity, to be handed down by the highest court in the land.

However, the Florida Supreme Court is just a tad busy right now.