Features
Tours de Farce: If It’s Thursday, It Must Be Sting
Due to the California energy crisis, we’ve been forced to alter our processing schedule in order to synchronize our operations with the statewide power grid. The following changes are effective immediately.
Concert dates for bands and artists that fall into the following genres will be processed on Mondays, Thursdays and Saturdays: Blues, Rock, New Country, Smooth Jazz and Hamster Revival. This includes, but is not limited to, itineraries for Widespread Panic, Shawn Colvin, Susan Tedeschi and Shawn Mullins.
The above is not to be confused with rolling blackout schedules. While Periodic Gas & Electric makes allowances for tour databank maintenance companies such as Pollstar.com, we are expected to “do our share.” Therefore, during Stage Three power alerts, we may be forced to alternate between displaying odd and even dates for ‘N Sync and Nick Cave. Needless to say, New Classic Rock, Old New Rock, Current Conservative Alternative and Hamster Teen bands will be available on Thursdays and every third Monday.
Of course, artists that can be categorized as Traditional Country, 70s Metal, 80s Death Metal and Hamster Mental Death Metal, may be viewed Thursdays and Sundays, along with the itineraries for Bernard Allison and Dan Bern. This schedule will only go into effect if Hugh Hefner’s seven girlfriends refrain from using their hair dryers at the same time, causing a massive power drain of the Los Angeles basin which would call for the implementation of Plan C.
Upon activation of Plan C, tour data will be limited to New Retro 60s bands, Modern Classic Early 90s bands and U2 sound-alike bands that are still schlepping the radio concert circuit. Alternate selections include Union 13, Honeymoon Suite and George Thorogood & The Destroyers. Hamster reunion bands from the last three decades will be available every Friday, Saturday and alternate Tuesdays.
We would also like to state that Pollstar.com is an energy conscious company and practices power conservation at every opportunity. We thank you for your patience during these difficult times. As always, we’ll leave the light on for you.