“Coming right up. Say, why so glum, chum?”

“My wife kicked me out of the house.”


“Yep. Said it was over for us two because I couldn’t get tickets for U2.”

“I’ve heard that before.”

“And when I think of all the shows we saw together, I can’t believe she kicked me out.”

“You really love concerts, eh?”

“You bet. I remember when I first met her. It was on the Boy tour in 1980 at Stage One in Buffalo. She was falling down drunk and I helped her to her car.”

“That was nice of you.”

“Then one thing led to another, and before I knew it, we were married. We spent our honeymoon following the band’s October tour and having incredible sex.”

“Uh? You two and U2?”

“No, just us two after U2.”

“You two must have loved U2.”

“For sure. For over twenty years, U2 was the only band for us two. I know there are a lot of other bands out there, great acts like Veruca Salt, Bad Religion and Duncan Sheik.”

“Don’t forget Little Feat and Digital Underground.”

“But those two are not U2. Ahh, the memories… Bono, The Edge, Clayton and the other guy. And to think that after 20 years of marriage, she leaves me because I couldn’t get a couple of tickets for their latest tour.”

“People can be like that.”

“Uh, uh. I never dreamed that she would drop me like yesterday’s Boy George ticket stub if I didn’t come through with tickets for us two to see U2. If I only knew then what I know now.”

“Hindsight is 20/20.”

“I know. Now that I think of it, I should never have married her.”

“Why? It sounds like you two had some good times with U2.”

“Yeah, but if I never married her, I could have seen some different bands over the years.”

“Well, live and learn.”

“I guess. Say, do you know if there are any tickets left for ‘N Sync?”