“How’s it going, George? Don’t you have… er… ‘custody’ this week?”

“Yeah, and I don’t mind telling you, Larry, that it’s been a rough few days. No matter what I do, they’re always screaming for more.”

“They’re never satisfied, eh?”

“It seems that way. I buy them tickets for O-Town and they ask me for Jessica Simpson. I buy seats in row B for Rammstein and they complain that I didn’t get them tickets for row A.”

“They can be like that.”

“You ain’t kidding. All I hear is, ‘let’s see Shades Apart,’ and ‘can we have tickets for Crossbreed and Spineshank?’ Sheesh, it’s enough to drive you nuts.”

“Patience, my friend. That’s what family life is all about.”

“I know, Larry, but all the screaming is getting me down. Like when I took them to the Lucinda Williams concert the other night. No sooner had we pulled out of the driveway when they started fighting over the radio. One of them wanted me to switch to the country station to hear the latest songs by Jerry Reed while the other wanted the rock station to see if they were giving away tickets for Guns N’ Roses and Patti Smith.”

“They really love their music, don’t they?”

“You’re not kidding. And they expect everyone to like what they like. On Wednesday I took them to the doctor for their annual checkups and all they did was gripe about the elevator music in the waiting room. One of them even climbed up on the receptionist’s desk and demand that they play a Systematic CD.”

“How cute.”

“Cute? You think it’s cute? Then I suppose you’ll think it was cute when we were caught in rush hour traffic last night, and one of them rolled down the window and shouted, ‘Out of our way, you freakin’ idiot! We’re going to be late for David Lee Roth!’ I thought that truck driver was going to tear my head off.”

“Sounds like you definitely had your hands full.”

“It certainly hasn’t been a picnic, Larry. Sometimes I feel like taking them to a show, like *NSYNC or Backstreet Boys, and dumping them off at the lost-and-found.”

“Surely, you can’t mean that, George.”

“No, I guess not. Anyway, it will all be over in a couple of days.”

“Really? Then what happens?”

“Then it’s my sister’s turn to take care of my parents.”