“Hi there. I’m your new roommate. Wow! Look at all the CDs! I’ve never seen so many CDs in one place. Except in a record store, of course. Me? No, I don’t have any CDs. But I have plenty of cassettes. That’s right, I just tape other people’s CDs. Saves on the cash, you know? But I don’t have that one by Nikka Costa. Mind if I tape it?

“Say, is that an Eric Clapton T-shirt? He’s one of my favorites. Uh, mind if I try it on? It’s okay, I showered this week. It looks like we wear the same size. Cool.

“I see you grabbed something at Mickey D’s. Mind if I swipe a couple of French Fries? Is that an Insane Clown Posse CD? I’m just starting to get into them. I think I’ll tape that next and… Oh, look, I’m all out of cassettes. You wouldn’t happen to… Thanks.

“Oh, hell, it looks like I forgot to pack my stereo. You don’t mind if I use yours, do you? No, don’t bother to get up. I’m sure I can figure it out, and… and…uh… Is it supposed to smoke like that? And it looks like the sparks burned a hole in your shirt. Mind if I grab another one? How about that Backstreet Boys T-shirt? What? It won’t fit me? Ridiculous. After all, the other one fit and… See? Like a glove.

“And I’d like to tape that Blues Traveler CD. And Snoop Dogg, Janet Jackson and The Beta Band. After all, we’re roommates, right? What’s yours is mine and what’s mine… Ow! I got a french fry stuck between my teeth. Heck, I think I forgot my toothbrush. Where’s yours? Uh? Germs? Don’t worry, I’ll rinse it before I use it.

“You know, I’m a pretty good judge of character and I think you’re going to be a great roommate. Oh, crap, I forgot to pack underwear. Say… Thanks.

“My name? Oh, stupid me. Please forgive my manners. It thought I already told you. “It’s Fanning. Shawn Fanning. But my friends call me ‘The Napster.’ Uh, you gonna eat that?”