“Hello, David. I’m calling about the Paul McCartney tickets. I was just going over my travel schedule and I realized you hadn’t told me which show I’m going to.”

“Oh, yes. I meant to call you about that.”

“I’ll be in California in April. Either the Oakland or San Jose show would do.”

“That could be a problem.”

“Or how about Florida in May? I’m going deep sea fishing, and I could easily make the Tampa show.”

“Er… Florida’s a bit difficult.”

“Or how about Detroit? Or New York? You know I always liked the Garden.”

“Ah… Yeah, well… ah… Look, I don’t know how to tell you this, but…”

“But what?”

“I couldn’t get the tickets.”

“What do you mean, you couldn’t get the tickets? You’re my manager. You know everyone in the biz.”

“Yes, but you wouldn’t believe the celebrities muscling for tickets. I tried to get you into the DC show, but Britney Spears snagged all the comps.”

“Then what about Cleveland? I can visit the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.”

“Cleveland’s a no-go. Dave Matthews Band scooped up all the best seats.”

“Vegas? Dallas?”

“Jewel and Hayden got there before me. I’m telling you, it’s almost impossible to get complimentary tickets for this tour.

“Did you tell them who the tickets were for?”

“I did, but they said it didn’t matter. They said that they only have so many tickets to go around, and they can’t please everybody.”

“Did you try talking directly to Paul?”

“Heck, I even called Heather. Neither of them could help me. They said the guest list is incredibly tight.”

“I just don’t believe it, David. There was a time when I was comped to all the shows.”

“Yes, but times change.”

“But this tour is special, David. He hasn’t toured in… in what? Ten years?”

“Something like that. Tell you what. I can get you tickets for Beatlejam. It features a collection of all-star musicians doing jam interpretations of Beatles classics. Trust me. You’ll love it.”

“Hmmm… I don’t know, David, I was so looking forward to seeing Paul.”

“I know, Ringo. So was I.”