Two days into a three-day weekend and what are you doing? Checking out the show listings like Prince playing Edmonton on May 31 or the Eagles playing Spokane on June 16. That’s all fine and dandy, but don’t you think you should go outside at least once this holiday weekend?

Please don’t take this the wrong way. We appreciate your patronage. It’s people like you visiting us each day and clicking on the schedules for Alanis Morissette, Neil Diamond and Slayer that keeps up and running’ 24/7.

But we’ve been feeling a bit concerned that you might be overdoing this tour date thing of late. We’ve noticed the pasty white skin and the dilated pupils as you stare blankly at the routings for Moby and Cher. We see your hand quiver as you click on the show listings for John Mayer and we can’t help but notice that you, uh, how shall we say this, haven’t come in contact with soap and water since Friday. There’s no use denying it. You really should get out more often.

After all, a person like you cannot live by the CRT monitor alone. Sometimes you just got to come up for air. So, push the keyboard away, get up and go outside. Yeah, suck in that fresh air! Check out that sky! Feel what it’s like to be alive!

Now, we know what you’re thinking. We can hear it in that tremble in your voice and we see it by that tiny line of drool dripping down from the corner of your lip. You’re already feeling tour-date withdrawal. You’re thinking that all this fun and play in the great outdoors might cost you a missed date for Fighting Gravity or Elton John. But trust us. Sometimes you just got to go out and experience God’s big green Earth first hand. Take it from us. We’ve been there. Sometimes you just gotta shut off the old desktop and go outside.

Besides, what do you think God made laptops and wireless modems for, anyway?