After all, we spend a good deal of our time dealing with changing tour schedules, such as the ones for Paul Westerberg and Southside Johnny & The Asbury Jukes, so we’re quite accustomed to change. But sometimes it seems as if this entire world is moving too darn fast. In fact, sometimes we feel like we’re little kids on the merry-go-round in grade school while it’s being pushed by the class bully who will eventually grow up to become the neighborhood sadomasochist. Yeah, dizzy and beaten. That’s how we feel about all these changes.

Like Ozzy Osbourne. We’re still trying to come to grips with the Ozzman as a family man / TV star. After all, we like to think of our Ozzy as the bat-bitting, Alamo-urinating, heavy metal prince of darkness that we fell in love with the first time we heard “Ironman.” Seeing our hero living in a mansion, raising his kids and keeping cats is just a little too weird for us. Someone should check their house for pods in the basement, you know?

We’re also having a helluva time with Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band. First, he puts the band together in the ’70s. Then he fires them in the ’80s. Then he brings them back three years ago, but with two guitarists. Don’t know about you, but all through that last tour, we kept worrying if Nils and Stevie were feuding behind the stage like some retreaded Smothers Brothers bit about how “Bruce always liked you best.”

Get a grip, we tell ourselves. We’ve got a lot of work to do, like prepping the schedules for Drive By Truckers, Dave Pirner and Chucho Valdes, and we can’t get bogged down bitchin’ about change. Focus! That’s the key. Focus on the job at hand and try not to think about our house burning down this morning, our dog mauling the mailman and our daughter’s plan to work her way through college by setting up an adult Website with The Impotent Sea Snakes. No, we must act like adults and not be intimidated by change. We will get through this!

However, we’re still having trouble dealing with this entire Eddie / Valerie breakup. Heck, we may even have to go back to group therapy. Damn changes.