“Ralph! I haven’t seen you since you left the company for that new job. They haven’t booted you out on your keister for incompetence, have they? Just kidding, Ralphie, just kidding.”

“Go ahead and laugh, Harry. I remember you guys making all those remarks about me when I gave my two-week notice. You and the boys standing around that water cooler, telling all those jokes about how I wasn’t bright enough for the job. Well, let me tell something, funnyman. I think anybody who doesn’t think I’m smart enough to handle the job is underestimating.”

“Oh, don’t take it so hard, Ralphie. You know what? I’ll bet you’ve been way too busy with your new gig to see any shows. Hey, I got an idea. How about letting your old coworkers treat you to a concert? Say, maybe Insane Clown Posse or Galactic. A real boys’ night out and let bygones be bygones.”

“Well, I think we’ll both agree that the past is over.”

“Now you’re talking, Ralphie. Look, we can’t afford the best seats. After all, it’s a small company, and with the economy on the skids the orders haven’t been coming in like they used to, but I’m sure the boys would love to take you out and see Hatebreed when they come to town. That is, if we can afford it.”

“That’s okay, Harry. I understand small business growth. I was one.”

“So, who would you like to see? Link Wray? Or how about Chris Robinson & The New Earth Mud? You know, we’d love to take you out to see Springsteen in April, but that’s right around tax time, and you know how it goes. Gotta feed the wife and kids, not to mention Uncle Sam.”

“You’re telling me? I know how hard it is to put food on your family.”

“Yeah, life ain’t getting any easier, that’s for sure. So, just pick the act, and me and the boys will pass around the ol’ collection hat and take you out for a fantastic evening. Jeffrey Osborne, Wilco or George Clinton & Parliament / Funkadelic, you name it and we’re there. Consider it a delayed ‘congratulations’ gift for landing your current job.”

“That’s awfully nice, Harry. And to think I always thought you boys considered me to be too stupid to succeed at my new job. However, I think you’ll agree that you and everyone else in the office really misunderestimated me.”

“Then it’s settled. I’ll talk to the boys, we’ll pick a night, take up a collection and then we’ll go out and have ourselves a real blowout.”

“It’s your money. You paid for it.”

“Speaking of money, Ralphie. If you don’t mind my asking, how much does your job as the president’s quote writer pay, anyway?”