Tours de Farce: Going To The Dogs
That’s the cornerstone of civilization. For if we’re not responsible for our actions, then cultures will crumble, societies will fall and we’ll be left with nothing but irresponsible people doing whatever they please. End result? Total anarchy.
I’ve been thinking about responsibility a lot over the past few weeks. That’s why I strive to be a more responsible person each and every day. No matter what obstacles may be in my way, no matter what hurdles I may face, I do my best to be the most responsible person you’ll ever meet.
Which is why, rain or shine, you’ll find me out on this sidewalk picking up dog doo.
Yes, it’s a nasty job, but one must think of one’s neighbors. Besides, I have it down to a routine – bend, inspect, sniff, scoop, bag, stand up. Over and over. But sometimes it can get quite ugly, for texture and form may be lacking in a dog’s diet. That’s when I think about the tours.
For instance, while I’m scooping up that first dropping of the day, I’m thinking about all those dates for that big Aerosmith / KISS co-headline. Or when I’m picking up the second mess of the day, I’m pondering the routings for The Yardbirds and Earth, Wind & Fire, and marveling at how all the cities fall in place, one after another. Yeah, the tours keep me sane while I’m acting responsible and cleaning up after man’s best friend.
Unfortunately, there are those who don’t act responsible. They look the other way when their pup drops a big one on the sidewalk, and then they stroll on down the street leaving nothing but a trail of poop in their wake. And when I see those people I add their names to the list. The list of people who must be forced to act responsibly.
But in the meantime, I’m out here on this sidewalk, picking up doggie dumplings and thinking about the tours, like Burning Spear & His Burning Band in Providence on August 15, or A Flock Of Seagulls playing in Syracuse or April Wine treating the folks to some Canadian rock n’ roll in Boise. After all, I can’t pretend that someone else will do it, for each one of us must do what one must. That’s what being responsible is all about, and make no mistake about it, I am responsible.
In fact, I’m feeling so responsible that I think I’ll even get a dog of my own.