Features
Tours de Farce: Star Star
But that’s to be expected. After all, we’ve been in business since 1931, and we’ve used a lot of celebrities in our time. Bette Midler, Alan Jackson, Pat Boone – they’ve all donned the Pollstar.com deely-bops and chartreuse windbreaker as they manned the front gate and personally shook the hand of each and every user. However, after running this Web site for 73 years, we’ve started to run out of famous names to throw at you as surf our home page.
That’s why we’re constantly on the lookout for the newly famous. Perhaps you’ve seen our scouts at shows by A Perfect Circle or Mariah Carey as they check all the fans moving through the turnstiles in the neverending search for the next big name. Or maybe you’ve had the chance to see our celebrity scouts in action, standing in the rest rooms at
Needles to say, it’s tough nailing down the flavor of the moment. That’s why we had such high hopes for celebritydom’s newest star. A face so fresh, so unique, so… so… pristine, that when we first heard of him, we knew he was Pollstar.com material and would be the perfect choice to announce the new tours, like the latest listings for Ziggy Marley, Finger Eleven and OK Go.
Alas. Fame is such a fickle pickle, and it’s not unusual to see today’s Pollstar.com celebrity greeter parking cars tomorrow. The trick to selecting the proper celebrities is to nail them when they’re hot, and chuck them on top of the trash heap of has-beens before they end up as a Final Jeopardy answer. That’s why we were sooo keen on our latest instant-superstar.
That is, until one of our execs pointed out that it’s been five days since the wedding, and Jason Allen Alexander ‘s fifteen minutes were up as soon as Britney signed the annulment papers. Hmmm… Perhaps it’s time to switch to Plan B. Does anybody know how to get in touch with the Mars Rover?