Ah yes, the signs. But tour signs, also known as the Signs of the Roadieac, represent only a small part of the perceived mystical effect concert routings have on music fans. Some believe that self-proclaimed psychics, such as Turi Geller, can bend concert routings with their minds, while others maintain that primitive markings in Peru are evidence of ancient promoters. Then there’s the belief that booking agents converse with their houseplants for advice on scheduling Josh Groban and The Cardigans.

“From fortune tellers who channel ancient groupies to witches and warlocks who believe that the future can be seen by scattering dates for Marc Anthony, Seven Mary Three and Bo Diddley under a full moon, the power of live music is more than meets the eye,” says Spacely. “For example, in the ’70s, people followed the Canadian cult known as the Five Man Electrical Band, whose own sign allegedly proclaimed ‘long haired freaky people need not apply.’ Yes, it’s all in the signs.”

Can concert routings predict the future? Can the dates for Motorhead determine if one will be lucky in love? Does being born under the sign of Sting indicate intelligence, elegance and taste, or just the self-induced illusion thereof? Furthermore, what are the consequences when children are conceived during shows by Lenny Kravitz and Puddle Of Mudd?

“Conception during concerts is guaranteed to give a child a head start in this wacky, crazy world,” says Spacely. Kid Rock, Metallica or The Beach Boys, it makes no difference, for a child conceived after the house lights dim and the headliner takes the stage is a child who is destined for greatness. Especially if it’s a Prince show.”

But what could possibly be so special about being conceived during a show by the Purple One?

“Why, it’s simple,” says Spacely. “Conception during a show by the Artist Formerly Known As A Symbol is definitely a sign o’ the times.”