Tours de Farce: Just A Fantasy
They say that we are out of touch with reality, that we ignore current events, like the situation in Iraq, in favor of trumpeting the latest dates for Green Day. They say that we turn a blind eye to the current presidential campaigns of Messrs. Bush and Kerry in favor of listing shows for Old 97’s and Franz Ferdinand. They say that, if given a choice, we’d rather talk about the upcoming new tour by The Dirtbombs instead of health care, education and the economy.
And you know what? They’d be right.
But what is fantasy but one’s chosen reality? Is it wrong to disregard the plight of humankind in favor of keeping track of the support acts for Rascal Flatts, or the major market appearances of Drive-By Truckers and Orgy? Or are they one and the same? If a promoter in Tokyo books a date for blink-182, might that cause a hurricane in Florida? Will European runs for Madonna and Ian Anderson affect the GNP of Brazil? Can a series of UK dates for Dido influence the outcome of the Scott Peterson trial in San Mateo? Are concerts and world affairs separate entities, or do they intertwine, much like a boa constrictor wraps itself around a plump, juicy, squealing hog, squeezing and crushing until that inevitable moment when one becomes dinner while the other the diner?
Unanswerable questions requiring nonsensical answers? Maybe so, but that’s the course we choose to follow. Truth be told, there are worse things to do than gathering the gigs for The Gathering or routing out the routing for the
So we follow the tours, we shadow the bands and we trail the artists. Wheat, BR549 or Wilco – It makes no difference as to the size of the band or the skill of the musicians, for this is our world. A world of date, city, state and venue, a land of The Big Wu playing in Milwaukee on September 22. And if that’s a fantasy, so be it. If we’re blinded to the reality of the struggle for dominance that’s played out daily between the alphas and the betas, that’s our choice. If we want to paint humanity as a collection of lost souls desperately seeking out good seats for Barry Manilow or John Mayer, then that’s the way it’s going to be. Pollstar.com stands for nothing if not the cold, hard facts represented by the schedules for KISS, Social Distortion and Tim McGraw. We have no time for fantasy, no room for tall tales and imaginary happenings. We deal in the concrete, not the porous, and we will not truck with speculation, whims and flights of fancy. In short, Pollstar.com is the epitome of reality. If you’re looking for fantasy, you’ll have to seek it elsewhere. However, that shouldn’t be a problem.
After all, most cable stations carry Fox News. If not, call your local cable company.