We’re asked that question every year at Christmas time, and wondering minds want to know the truth about the bearded gentleman who only gets out once a year. Is there really a fat man who lives at the North Pole? Does he have eight tiny reindeer that pull his present-laden sleigh through the skies, bringing gifts to all those who have been good and pure? Is there a Santa Claus? Is there, huh? Huh?

Of course those of us in upper management at Pollstar.com will have no truck with legends, myths and fables. We deal only in hard facts, such as Social Distortion playing in Las Vegas on February 3, and we have no time to partake in the saga of a portly old soul dishing out trinkets to the deserving in some bizarre, socialistic experiment.

On the other hand, we can hardly shatter the dreams of those whose hearts ache for Christmas Day, for the Holiday of all Holidays often brings hope to the forlorn, an expectation that all good deeds are not for naught, and that they too will be rewarded for their actions during the past twelve months. We see their eyes filled with the eternal optimism of youth as they look towards us seeking the answer to the eternal question, “Is there a Santa Claus?” And our hearts go out to them, for we know that the truth, like the schedule for Paul Westerberg or Tegan And Sara, is often clouded in mystery and shades of gray that often spur more questions than answers.

So we tell them, “Yes! Yes! Oh, YES! There is a Santa Claus!” We tell them that he spies on them throughout the year, comparing their simple lives against some twisted code of ethics that could only be dreamed up by some hermit-like old man who lives in the arctic with a house-full of elves. Then we show them a picture of the Unibomber. Just to drive the point home.

Yeah, we know. You’re wondering how we can propagate such trash. You’re wondering how we can look ourselves in the mirror each morning knowing that we are part of the problem and not the solution. In fact, you’re probably saying that we should stick to what we do best – managing concert data for The Frames, Xavier Rudd and Stephen Kellogg, and not continue the legend of jolly St. Nick and his present-laden bag of treats. You wonder how we live with ourselves as we spend year after year assuring those who ask that there really is a Santa Claus.

Actually, it’s quite easy when you consider the alternative. By reaffirming the existence of Santa Claus, it keeps our employees from asking for Christmas bonuses. However, we always keep a bag of coal in the office. You know, just in case.