It’s the “dirty little secret” of the music industry. You won’t see it in Rolling Stone or Blender, and VH1 and MTV won’t even mention it. But it’s out there, breaking up families, destroying relationships and upsetting the overall social balance that separates us from the chimps. In fact, some experts agree, that if left unchecked, it could ultimately lead to the downfall of the entire human race.

It’s the growing number of women who leave their husbands and boyfriends so that they may take up with musicians.

“The numbers are definitely on the upswing,” says Dr. Samuel Malone, author of 50 Ways To Leave Your Lover for Elton John, last year’s pop science best seller which detailed the stories of thousands of women who gave up their families and homes so that they could spend time with one of the most prolific piano pounders in the history of pop music. “Kenny G, Trey Anastasio, Michael Bolton – the list of musicians who, for some inexplicable reason, cause grown women to dump their husbands and leave their children is unbelievable.”

But why are women leaving their husbands and families for musicians? At first glance, the answers seem almost obvious, for who wouldn’t be seduced by all the money and fame inherent with becoming involved in a relationship with, say, a Lenny Kravitz or a Bob Dylan? However, many experts believe that love has little to do with dating a music celebrity.

“The backstage passes are definitely turn-ons,” says Dr. Malone. “As are limo rides, tour buses and open bars. In fact, when you get right down to it, your average, everyday male just can’t compete with the glamour and excitement a Sting or a Seal can offer a woman. Not to mention the mystique that naturally goes with a man who has only one name.”

Is this the end of civilization as we know it? Will women continue to forsake home and family so that they can appear as window-dressing on the arms of countless musicians? Will women taking up with stars such as Elvis Costello and Dwight Yoakam bring about the demise of the traditional concept of marriage?

“Sure, the number of women leaving men for musicians is astronomical,” says Dr. Malone. “However, we’re expecting those figures to bottom out for awhile. However, we still can’t predict as to how long. When it comes to women hooking up with musicians, there are just too many variables to accurately predict the future.”

What? Too many variables? Such as…

“Such as how long Rod Stewart’s next marriage will last,” answers Dr. Malone. “Even the geeks down in the chaos theory lab are having trouble figuring that one out.”