Thanks For The Memories, Weezer – Now Please Break Up

A concerned citizen from Seattle has started a fundraising campaign to convince Weezer to break up in exchange for $10 million.

The release of Weezer’s eighth studio album, Hurley, featuring the smiling mug of “Lost” star Jorge Garcia, must have been the final straw for James Burns.

The Seattle resident said he’s trying to raise the $10 million so that the band can end its “abusive relationship” with its fans.

“I have never been a fan of this band. I think that they are pretty much horrible, and always have been. Even in the early ‘90s. But this isn’t about me. This is about the Weezer fans. They are our brothers and sisters, our friends, our lovers,” Burns writes in a pitch posted to the fundraising site

Photo: Andrew Markowitz
Byrd Stadium, College Park, Md.

Burns says he doesn’t want to deal with more releases like 2005’s Make Believe or 2009’s Raditude and he doesn’t want to have to read about the band in the media.

“Every year, Rivers Cuomo swears that he’s changed, and that their new album is the best thing that he’s done since Pinkerton and what happens? Another pile of crap like “Beverly Hills” or “I’m Your Daddy.” This is an abusive relationship, and it needs to stop now.

“I am tired of my friends being disappointed year after year. I am tired of endless whimsical cutesy album covers and music videos. I’m sick of hearing about whatever this terrible (and yes, even if you like the early stuff, you should be able to admit that they are wretched now) excuse for a band is up to these days.”

Although $10 million may seem like a lofty sum, Burns points out that the goal can easily be met if all 852,000 fans who bought 1995’s Pinkerton chip in $12.

Disillusioned former fans that wish Weezer would have stopped making music after Pinkerton can make donations through Your credit card will only be charged if Burns reaches his goal of $10 million. As of this post, the campaign has raised $194 so far with $9,999,806 to go.

Yesterday Weezer drummer Patrick Wilson responded to the campaign through Twitter. He says the band will agree to break up if the campaign can pony up a few more dollars.

“If they can make it 20, we’ll do the ‘deluxe breakup!’ Wilson wrote.

Weezer is gearing up for the Memories Tour, in which the band will perform the band’s self-titled 1994 album (better known as the “Blue Album”) and Pinkerton in their entirety over two nights of shows in select cities. Gigs are planned in San Francisco, Boston, New York, Chicago and Universal City, Calif.

Click here to donate to Weezer’s break up campaign.