Features
Pitbull Headlining North To Alaska?
David Thorpe, who writes for the humor website SomethingAwful.com and the Boston Phoenix, has taken a special interest in Pitbull’s Facebook page contest. His goal is to help send the rapper far, far away, to the land of the Kodiak bear.
Here’s how the contest, sponsored by Walmart and Energy Sheets, works. Fans are asked to log onto Facebook and “like” their local Walmart’s Facebook page. The Walmart that gets their most new “likes” will win an appearance from Pitbull.
Photo: AP Photo
Estadio Olimpico Felix Sanchez, Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic
On Friday Thrope tweeted that he and fellow Something Awful writer Jon Hendren had a new mission in life. They wanted Kodiak’s Walmart to win the contest, forcing Pitbull to make the trek to Kodiak, Alaska, population 6,130.
Why? Why not.
Here are some of Thorpe’s recent tweets convincing his followers to get on board with the plan. Thorpe’s hashtag to go along with the Kodiak plan is “ExilePitbull.”
“Go to this page and enter zip code 99550, then Like the Kodiak Walmart”
“Do you like imagining Pitbull being mauled by a Kodiak bear on a remote, frozen island? Enter 99550, like Kodiak AK”
“Pitbull doing a photo op with the moose from Northern Exposure #ExilePitbull”
“If you haven’t liked the Kodiak Walmart yet, you haven’t pictured Pitbull standing in a river, biting into a raw salmon”
“Pitbull, frostbitten, forlorn and surrounded by an icy wasteland in all directions, drops to his knees and screams: DAALLEEeee”
“Pitbull’s beard is flecked with ice, his face rough and windburned. ‘I am excited to share Energy Sheets with my fans.’”
“Yes: the Kodiak city council is constantly at war with bears. Let’s send Pitbull there.”
Pitbull isn’t worried about battling bears and snow. In response to the Kodiak shenanigans, he tweeted Friday, “I hear there’s bear repellant at Kodiak, Alaska @walmartspecials @sheets #exilepitbull daleeeeeee!”
This effort recalls the infamous Internet campaign of 1998, when People magazine’s online poll got punked. People suggested that the general public would be allowed to vote for its Most Beautiful People In The World, a list of 50 that was likely already picked by People’s editors, with Leonardo DiCaprio one of the winners. However, a chain email sidetracked the poll. It said the public had no say in the results and instead suggested people nominate a write-in candidate, Hank The Angry Drunken Dwarf, famous from his appearances on Howard Stern’s radio program. Hank eclipsed the competition, garnering hundreds of thousands of votes and crashing Time Inc.’s Pathfinder servers in the process. Of course, People magazine refused to honor Hank’s victory.
Will Walmart keep its word? We’ll have to wait a few more weeks to see if Pitbull will be packing his bags for Alaska. The Facebook contest launched June 18 and ends July 15 at 8 p.m. EST. As of post time, the Kodiak Walmart’s Facebook page had 36,439 likes.