Features
Tours de Farce: Monday, Monday
That’s right! We love the first day of the workweek. The sound of computer workstations booting, the sight of new concert routings right off of the trucks, and the smell of the heating system clicking in as we settle down to another five days of typing in dates, cities and venues for U2, Maroon5 and Elvis Costello. Ahhh. Glorious!
And we love concert promoters! Those brave souls who put it all on the line so that you may have the finest live music ever to wash the concert stage in a sonic caress of pure audio joy and ecstasy. Destiny’s Child, LeAnn Rimes, Lenny Kravitz – you name the act and your local promoter is there, pulling out all the stops to make each concert the most memorable event you’ll ever see. Promoters are God’s gift to the human race, for without those brave, trustworthy souls our amphitheatres would remain silent, our sports arenas would stay dark and parking attendants would go hungry. Yes, promoters are the tops!
And we worship booking agents! They’re the men and women who bring it all together, who make sure Gov’t Mule and Harry Connick Jr. receive all that’s coming to them for schlepping from town to town, enduring sound checks, local fast-food cuisine and strange men and women who hang out by the backstage door. Make no mistake about it, Booking agents are the most adorable, honest, stalwart people that have ever existed in the entertainment strata, bar none. Like the gods of Mt. Olympus who used to take on human guise and walk among us ordinary mortals, booking agents are the crème de la crème of all that’s good and wonderful in the world today.
And let’s not forget about those artist managers. Those clairvoyant and mystical people who can pluck acts out of obscurity and carefully guide them to the top of the charts. Yanni, The Hives, Flogging Molly – they all have managers who nurtured and raised them, people who fed artists when they were hungry and clothed them when they were naked. The managers are the ones with the plans, the keepers of the big pictures and the architects of careers. As everyone knows, artist managers make this big crazy world go `round.
Yeah, we love Mondays. We’re crazy for promoters, we simply adore booking agents and we have a big love jones for artist managers. We can’t get enough schedule updates for Mel Tillis and we think support band listings for Bowling For Soup and Keith Urban are to die for. We love everything there is to love about listing dates for Sting, Motley Crue and Slipknot. We are the happiest, most joyful, blissful data entry people the world has ever seen. We love everything!
But, do you know what we love most?
We love being able to lie our butts off without ever feeling even a single moment of remorse or guilt. Gosh, aren’t Mondays wonderful?