“Uh?”

“Have you looked out the window at the neighbors’ house? Did you see who’s working on their front yard?”

“Uh, uh…”

“Why I swear… It looks just like U2.”

“Uh, uh…”

“Oh my god, it is U2! Bono is weeding the rose bushes. And I do think that’s The Edge edging the yard. Yes, I’m sure of it.”

“Uh, uh…”

“This is strange, Abner. I mean, last week David Byrne was cleaning their pool, and the week before it was Skid Row and Jimmie’s Chicken Shack re-roofing their house. You listen to me, Abner, things aren’t quite on the up-and-up at the neighbors’ house.”

“Uh, uh…”

“Come on, Abner, pull yourself out from behind that newspaper and take a look.”

“Uh, uh…”

“I’m telling you, Abner, there’s something fishy going on at the neighbors’ house. Like that party they threw last week.”

“Uh, uh…”

“I suppose they knew all those celebrities, uh? Like they’re good friends with The Derek Trucks Band, The 5th Dimension and The Bacon Brothers.”

“Uh, uh…”

“And Sunday morning they had both *NSYNC and the Backstreet Boys washing their car.”

“Uh, uh…”

“And did you see who they hired for a babysitter? If that’s not Emmylou Harris, then I’m Michael Jackson.”

“Uh, uh…”

“You mark my words, Abner, something is mighty strange at the neighbors’ house. Every time I look over there, there’s always a musician or a band hanging about. If it’s not Bob Dylan or Billy Squier, then it’s Days Of The New, Ambrosia and Blue Oyster Cult. Someone should get to the bottom of this.”

“Uh, uh…”

“I know you don’t believe me, Abner. You think I’m crazy. You think I’m imagining things.”

“Uh, uh…”

“You’re just like the rest of them. They all think I’m off my rocker. But there are strange doings over at that household.”

“Uh, uh…”

“Oh, what’s the use? Nobody believes me.”

“Uh, uh…”

“I mean, take a look at that woman’s husband, Abner. I swear that’s not the same Darrin Stephens she moved here with. The new Darrin looks entirely different. And what about that time Marilyn Manson changed into a frog? Or when it snowed in July? Abner? Abner?? Are you listening to me, Abner?”

“Uh, uh…”

“I swear, it’s almost like they’re… they’re… bewitched!”

“Uh, uh… Er… Did you say something, Gladys?”