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Tours de Farce: It Keeps You Runnin’
“Yeeooowwww!”
“Hey! Are you alright in there?”
“Yeah. It’s just my stomach. All those chili dogs and Jolt Colas didn’t set too well with… with…”
“Getting the news that the company’s laying everyone off and shutting down?”
“Yeah. I knew we were in bad shape, but I didn’t think we’d go out of business. And to think I gave them some of the best code I’ve ever written.”
“I hear you. Three years of selling toys on the Web, and all I have to show for it is a pile of worthless stock certificates.”
“You too, uh? I worked 21 hour days, and for what? Next time, I’m working strictly for cash. None of this stock option bulls… Yeowwww!”
“You gonna live?”
“Yeah, it’s just the bean burritos and prunes I had for breakfast. You know what really burns me about this entire mess?”
“What’s that?”
“I’m going to be out of a job in a few weeks, and I have absolutely no cash for all the big concerts.”
“I hear you. They announced Dave Matthews Band dates yesterday, and I’m flat broke.”
“And Patty Loveless, Lee Rocker and Everlast all have new dates, but I can barely afford to… Yeeeeoowwwwww!”
“Are you sure you’re alright?”
“Sure, I’m sure. Just the sugar-coated chocolate broccoli I had for a snack. I was looking forward to seeing Martina McBride.”
“And Toadies and Company Of Snakes. But I’m going to have to find a new gig to pay for those shows.”
“If my next employer tries to pay me in stock options I’m going to tell him to take his IPOs and stuff them up… Oh, oh.”
“What?”
“It looks like I’m fresh out of paper. Do you have any extra in your stall?”
“Sure thing. Which would you like? The common stock or the preferred?”
“Oh, the preferred. This is definitely a two-ply job.”